Checkup 13: Getting help for depression
This month the topic for Checkup 13 is depression. For some, it is a taboo topic, but help is available.
Amy of Brownsburg knew she was slipping away. She was isolating herself from her co-workers and her husband and sons. She started gathering pills and planning suicide.
"Thinking about it now it seems ridiculous. First of all, how did I allow myself to get that far gone and that far in a hole?" she said. "I needed help and I just didn't know how to get it."
A deep dark struggle was brewing inside for months.
"People that know me, that work with me or even my family will be shocked to hear," said Amy, who is 43.
"I had a plan for suicide and I think most people would be really surprised by that because it looked so good on the outside, my life," she said.
The mother of two, was happily married and loved her job, but still plotted an escape with prescription drugs.
"I was to the point where I was holding the bag. I was counting out the drugs. I was ready to go," she said.
She shared her plan with bible study friend Carol.
"We talked about if you did do it, would God accept you in heaven or not?" she said.
Amy knew she was in trouble but believed there was no fix for her feelings.
"I consider myself a strong, intelligent level-headed person and I thought if I couldn't fix it, how are these people going to help me? How are they going to fix it? It was a pride thing. I had to lose that piece of pride to go in there and see if they could do anything," she said.
"You might be surprised how many people still are fearful that if they talk to a counselor at the stress center or come here for help, that it means they have to stay overnight. That doesn't necessarily mean that at all. This means you are going to speak with a counselor about what your concerns are or what your family or friend's concerns are, and then we will make a recommendation from there," said Kimble Richardson, St. Vincent Stress Center.
Amy's treatment at the St. Vincent Stress Center included group and individualized therapy.
"Finally when I decided to get with the program and take the materials home and study them and do actually what they tell you to do, then I got better and I felt by the time I left, I felt so strong and so confident and so in control of what I needed to do to stay healthy and stay safe," she said.
For Amy it means, continuing to share her faith and expressing gratitude for her family.
"I am back to encouraging people which is what I love to do," she said. "I love my kids. I'm so lucky. I have the best boys in the world."
Amy says group therapy was very helpful for her. Now she is optimistic and looking forward to Christmas with her family.
If you would like to talk with someone for Checkup 13 this month, you may call to register for a consultation, or conversation with a St. Vincent Health professional at one of these locations: Anderson, Indianapolis and Kokomo.
Register online until midnight or call 1-866-824-3251 until 7:00 pm.